Dear Daughter:: A Letter From Me At 30 To You At 30

Dear Daughter: A Letter From Me At 30 To You At 30. Logo: Houston Moms blog. A photograph of a person holding a pen over a piece of paper.

Dear Sweet Girl,

I wanted to write you a letter as I turn 30 for you to open and read when you turn 30 {and I’ll be 56… YIKES}. I thought of doing this the other day when I tucked you into bed and you asked me to lay down next to you and scratch your back “for just a minute.” As I did, I thought about how quickly time was going by and how one day–sooner than I realize–you’ll be turning 30, and there are just some things that the 30-year-old version of your mother wants you to know.

Your Dad is writing a letter for your brother to open when he turns 30 because, well, I think this time in a man’s life sometimes means something a little different than it does for a woman. For women, I think we tend to view turning 30 as a negative thing; like, we’re not young anymore, and we’re about to start going downhill really quickly, and your metabolism is just going to suck now {that one is, unfortunately, actually true}. And I think sometimes it can be a marker for getting serious about starting a family because apparently our bodies just aren’t in their prime anymore. But girl, don’t stress too much about all that; your Granzie had me at 38 years old, so tough genes run in the family. I have found several grey hairs already, though {and freaked out accordingly}.

Truthfully, I’m very much at peace with where I am in life at 30. I have two beautiful children {you and your brother, of course}, I’m still happily in love with your Daddy, we live in a lovely home, I have a wonderful job, and we have family and friends surrounding us with more love and support than we could ever need.

But don’t let me fool you, dear girl:: even at 30, I’m still just out here winging it.

I expected to have it all figured out by now. When I was a kid, 30 sounded so old. Like, a for real grown up. But as it turns out, this is not the age at which the instruction manual for life is given to you. I don’t really know what I’m doing, or if I’m doing all the right things. I honestly just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop at any moment and leave me with absolutely no clue what move to make next. Your current favorite movie, Frozen II, offers some good advice on this. When you don’t know what the future holds, you can only do the next right thing. Just do the next right thing. [Can a respectable 30-year-old woman steal her personal mantra from a Disney movie? Sure, why not.]

To prove my authenticity in the realm of not having it all together, I will share something a little embarrassing with you. At this precise moment in time, your Dad is out of town and your Granzie has come to stay with me for the night to help me with you and your brother, and be of some company. I have never stayed home alone all night before. Let me repeat that for emphasis: I have never stayed home alone all night before. And I am THIRTY. If that fact alone doesn’t tell you that I’m still not the adultiest adult, then I don’t know what does. I am, however, attempting to stay home alone tomorrow night–you’ll have to ask me how it went 27 years from now when you read this letter.

But despite my inadequacies at adulting, I’ve gleaned a bit of wisdom along my journey through the years. Most of it has been gained through personal trial and error, and you probably grew up hearing all of it if I did my job as your mom. Maybe if we both follow some of this advice, we can get it right by the time we’re 40…

Here’s 10 little tid bits of wisdom I’m clinging to at 30 {in no particular order}::

  1. Do your best to rise and fall with the sun, there is truly no better schedule. Except daylight saving time sucks. I hope they do away with that before you’re 30.
  2. Create good exercise habits now if you haven’t already! Don’t be like your mom and just think you can ride on good genes through your twenties, and then have two kids, and that everything will be as it was before. It won’t be.
  3. Don’t get caught in the Coffee + Wine Cycle. It’s a trap.
  4. Freeze your leftovers/close-to-expired food instead of letting them go bad in the fridge. It’s a waste of resources and money, and cleaning it all out of your fridge weeks later is a huge downer.
  5. Go outside Rain or shine, sick or well. Get out!
  6. Never lose your sense of adventure. Immersing your senses in new places resets your brain in a magical way that helps you find gratitude for what you have and crave experiences over things.
  7. Be who you are. Speak your mind. But, be kind. You don’t need to make everyone happy like you may have once thought you did, but don’t forget to be respectful and kind to everyone even if you see things differently.
  8. Get out of your own head. That goes for all your fears, doubts, and ideas of what failure looks like, as well as your opinions. Listen to people you trust who love you, and believe them when they tell you you’re awesome and offer advice on how to be even more awesome.
  9. You’re not too old to take some risks, or try new things. And you’re not too old to look and feel good in a bold red lip, a fresh blow out, and a form flattering dress. Feeling like you look good will always make you feel good, at any age.
  10. Everything is going to be okay. Has it ever not worked out? Sometimes it’s not the way we think it should be, or want it to be, but it’s always the way it’s supposed to be in the end. It’s all part of the journey–just stick with it, and trust that God knows what he’s doing.

My girl, I hope and pray all the best things for you from now until you’re 30, and happily ever after. I have a feeling, even now, that you’re going to do great things. I’ll keep working on getting you to listen to instructions and try to instill some good in you. Oh, that reminds me; I forgot one very important nugget of wisdom::

11. Call your mom. No matter how old you are, or if you have kids of your own, everyone still needs their mommy.

I love you more than the moon, and the sun, and all the stars, and more and more and more than that.


Your Mom At 30

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Dear Daughter: A Letter From Me At 30 To You At 30. Logo: Houston Moms blog. A photograph of a person writing a letter.

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Christie is a born and raised Houstonian who hails from Cypress and now resides with her family in Katy, TX. She married her husband in 2012, after they both graduated from Texas State University. They welcomed their daughter, Emmy Faye, in 2016, and their son, Jesse, in 2019. Christie has loved story-telling--in it's many forms--from an early age, which is why she loves blogging; she doesn't spare the details about her thoughts and experiences in motherhood, trials of infertility, and the everyday ups and downs of adulthood. You can expect a lot of honesty, a healthy portion of humor, and maybe even some inspiration. When she's not spending her free-time blogging, she is songwriting, painting, practicing her calligraphy, hanging out with her family and friends, or leading worship at her church. You can read more of her musings on her personal domain, Little Blog of Hellos!


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