DISCLAIMER :: I AM NOT PREGNANT!!!!!
Okay, now that that’s out of the way…
When 25 year old Sarah would close her eyes and look into the future, there were lots of kids in it. I’m not sure exactly what lots was, but it felt like more than 2. I grew up with two younger brothers, and I liked having a gang of kids in my family. As I get older I realize what an even greater gift it is to have adult siblings. While I’d love to fill up a whole Thanksgiving table – life, fertility, money, life, age, and life have my husband and I on the edge of contemplating the addition of a third baby, a caboose on this train. I say contemplating, but I really mean, making the “when to go for it” decision.
I will admit sometimes I think I’m crazy, CRAZY. My life is full in many ways, including the fact that every single second of my week is packed to the brim. How in the heck am I going to add a baby? I already get frustrated when my kids are moving too slow, or they’ve torn the living room apart for the 3rd time in an afternoon, or there is NEVER a clean sippy cup even though the dishwasher runs nightly. Does a third epidural contain a dose of patience?
Other people also think I’m crazy, and they have NO problem telling me about it when this conversation comes up or someone inquires on their own about my family planning. I am the “lucky” mother of a girl/boy combo, which unbeknownst to me is akin to hitting life’s lottery. Going into this mothering game, I could have cared less what sex my children were – I was just looking for healthy and happy. I didn’t realize that once you got one of each, your baby making days were over!
I’m also scared. What if I can’t give 3 kids what I can give 2 kids? What if I’m broke forever, tack on another 5 years of childcare! And not to mention my house is too small!
You know these crazy and scared feelings always seem to fade though, when I hear a pregnancy announcement, smell a newborn head, or talk to a dear friend about future planning. These are the moments when I know I want another baby, and I’m not sure how much longer I can wait. I’ll just spend my pregnancy collecting pep talks. So…just do it, right? Take the leap!?! What made you jump?
I’m with you on the one-boy-plus-one-girl-equals-perfect-family weirdness! That was us until we got pregnant (a little before planned) with baby three. And, would you believe it, we moved to a SMALLER house and don’t really miss the space.
Now that our son is 4 and our daughter barely 3, they can just do so much more for themselves that a baby is totally manageable – if you lower your expectations of “clean” and “homemade.” It’s a great trade off for us. Also, I am much more laid back with this baby and expect getting out the door to take forever so there is less stress for me when it does take forever.
I’m an only child so watching the kids play (and fight) with each other and entertain the baby is pretty novel to me. I already love the chaos of holidays. We won’t be able to afford nice ski vacations, select sports leagues, and fully-paid college educations for each kid and they will wear mostly hand-me-downs. Those things are wonderful for any family that can afford them but they just aren’t the most important things so if more kids is what you want, don’t let those things stop you.
Best wishes for whatever and whenever you decide. One is great and so is five 🙂
I love this perspective! Spot on mom. I am welcoming baby #3 in 6 weeks.
We just had 3 AND 4 together when we were just going for #3. And as a mom of newborn twins, I feel like 3(4) is way easier that 1 and 2. It’s just a bunch of crazy madness after 2 so if you’re feeling the itch…go for it! 🙂 I was scared to pieces when we saw TWO at our 8 weeks ultrasound, but wouldn’t have it any other way now! You know what you’re doing now…it’s just not as tricky as it was with one. 🙂
Do it.
We also have a boy and girl, they are 3 years apart and are 6, and 3. I’m due with baby #3 in early Nov. We left it up to God. Truly. I didn’t want to stress over it. We just didn’t want to not give it a try and later regret it. Lo and behold, God had a third in mind for us. At first I freaked out bc we have SUCH a good thing with the first two BUT with my friends so excited for me and a few family members I started to realize what a wonderful blessing it was. In fact, my grandma said the third is the blessing child. The fun one. The bonus child if you will. She said to think about how much love this baby is going to be born into. Two siblings and parents who ADORE her and aren’t stressed about raising her! Such truth bc I feel so much peace and love with this one. So relaxed. I know it’s my last so I’m going to enjoy every single second. If you choose to have a third you will be blessed as well. Cheers to trying 😉