Michelle T :: How I Became a Mother

Michelle T’s Story

How I became a mother…

My story is a story so very different from the other fabulous mamas that have shared their journeys so far. Different, but yet girls all over the world find themselves in stories similar to mine every single day.

The day I found out I was pregnant and that I was going to be a mom, I was 20 years old.

I was a sophomore in college.

And I was unmarried.

And in that day, as I stared down at the positive pregnancy test, my life forever changed.

There is so much more to that part of my story and my pregnancy, but out of respect for my daughter, and of course, the others involved in her story, I choose to keep that private. One day her father and I will sit down and have to have a very real, very honest, and I am sure very difficult talk with her. It is a conversation I play in my head often. How do you tell the person you love most in the world that she wasn’t planned for? The person that gave your life purpose.  The person who saved you when you were so very lost.  How do you look her in the eye and tell her the truth? To tell her “Do as I say, not as I have done?”

I have no answers to those questions. Hopefully with time, those answers will come.

On September 23, 2003, Madisyn was born. It is a night I will never forget. In one instant I went from being a scared, selfish 21 year old girl, to being responsible for the most beautiful baby girl I had ever laid my eyes on. Everything about me changed in that moment.

Those first weeks of being a mom were some of the most terrifying of my life. I had become so consumed with love for my new baby that I didn’t want to sleep. I didn’t want to eat. I never wanted to leave her.  I didn’t want anyone else to hold her. I wanted to watch her every breathe. And for the first month or so, I did. I still remember the day my mom told me I had to get out of the house. She called my friend Channing and had her take me shopping. I cried the entire time. We spent maybe 30 minutes at a Target just a few minutes from my house before she had enough of my begging to take me back to my baby.

It took a little while, but I eventually found my balance as a mom. And while I was living a very different life from other girls my age, I was happy. I had my girl. And everything I did was for her.

I eventually had to go to work to provide for us. And in my new job, came a family. That family was found in my coworkers. I was blessed to be surrounded by the most supportive, uplifting, and amazing people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. They loved on Madisyn and I. They prayed for us, took care of us…they shared life with us. And I was content. Madisyn and I had a life that was simple and at times tough, but it was ours together.

A few years passed by, and another unexpected surprise came my way – I met the man that would become my husband. A man who looked past my past and loved me for who I was. And more importantly, he loved Madisyn. From the get go, he was respectful of my time with her and understood that she was my priority. And as time went on and the months passed by, we fell in love. And just like the song goes…

First comes love,

Then comes marriage,

Then comes the baby in a baby carriage.

On December 18, 2009, we welcomed Megan into our world, and I became a mom for the second time. I was a little older, a little wiser, and in a totally different place in my life. And in that moment of holding her for the first time, my life forever changed again. I was now the mom to two little girls.

Her first year and a half passed quickly, and in no time we found ourselves approaching her second birthday. My husband and I decided we wanted to have one more baby to make our family complete. We decided to start trying at the first of the year.

Fast forward to February, and once again we were met with an unexpected surprise. Not only did we get pregnant in the first month of trying, but we soon found out we were not only expecting a baby, but we were expecting TWINS!

On October 15, 2012, Jack and Liam entered our world, and I became a mom for the third and fourth time. My sweet little bubbas made our family complete, and just like before, our lives forever changed.

Sometimes I think I become more of a mother with each day that passes with my kids. Each day I grow more, learn more, love more.  I still have a long way to go. More to grow. More to learn. But I like to think I am am getting there.

For now, I choose to live in the moment, and I love. I love them so much. They are my whole world.

This girl right here though,

She always has and always will have a special place in my heart.  She changed me and made me better. She made me a MOM. And for that I will always be eternally grateful.

[hr] Please Note :: Bassett Baby Planning is graciously sponsoring our ‘How I Became a Mother Series’…and we would not have it any other way!  We are passionate about all that they are doing for new and expecting moms, and we encourage you to contact them to help in your journey to becoming a mother too.

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