The city of Houston is a little over 600 square miles, so it’s safe to say that most of us spend a fair amount of time in our cars. Usually with little companions with us barking orders from the backseat. This can lead to a powder keg of issues, but I live by a simple motto, “My Car, My Rules.”
The most important of these rules is…
No kids music.
I just can’t do it. When the Beltway is kind, the time to work can only be thirty minutes. A time I fill with 90’s pop and Podcasts. But the ride home is usually brutal. BRUTAL! And then we have daycare pickup and another 15-20 minutes home. To add “Wheels on the Bus” on top of that is a form of masochism I did not sign up for. And while we haven’t listened to the Frozen soundtrack in a few months, there was a time when it was a daily occurrence in the house. At least I could escape to a different room. I have to deal with 6 lanes of traffic, unyielding mini vans, and jerks who don’t thank you wave when I let them into my lane. YOU let it go, Elsa.
I’m the person you see singing at the top of their lungs in the car next to you. Did you see where I listen to the 90’s pop?! Don’t let No Doubt come on. I will sing at you. I have sat in the car to finish singing “The Humpty Dance” before I pick the kid up. I’ve shushed her so I can belt out “You Oughta Know” without interruption.
I know Kidz Bop is an alternative to the top 40 channels, but that’s not an option either. I can’t stand it. I already hate that some channels take Nicki Minaj’s verse out of “Bang, Bang.” Don’t get me wrong, I do censor some, but only to where we aren’t listening to death metal.
We make sure Addy gets a variety of music in her life. Mostly it helps that Disney and Dreamworks tend to listen to 70’s soul, and none of us can get enough of the “Awesome Mix” from Guardians of the Galaxy. She’s also a giant Beyonce fan, so we’ve created a Spotify playlist for her. Plus it’s kinda fun to bond with your kid belting out Taylor Swift’s Bad Blood. HEY!
Hey, HEY! Get your stuff out of my car.
When we exit the car, we take all our stuff with us. Get your bag, get your sunglasses, get your Merida, what is that? WHAT IS THAT? Get your pouch remnant! Get your papers from school.
Leave my umbrella.
I make a point to declutter the car every time I stop to get gas. Straw wrappers, used napkins, fast food receipts, gotta go. A quick sweep, and it’s not a mess in there. Of course I don’t expect this behavior from anyone but myself. I’m not judgy of how clean or dirty anyone’s car is…
However, I judge stickers.
This includes bumper stickers, clingy window decals, and stick family representatives. Sure they are cute or whatever, but I just…no. Not on my car. Why?! I’ve donated to candidates and gotten a bumper sticker in return, and it sits neat and tidy in a drawer somewhere. Addy might be sorely disappointed if they send home honor roll stuff in the future. Put that on the fridge, thank you.
So that’s it. My Car, My Rules. Do you have any car rules…or does anything go for you? Do they see you rollin’? Are they hatin’? What’s your mom car rules?