Sometimes I Hate My Husband and The Art of the Hate Date

I love my husband. In every sense of the word he is my partner. He is an amazing father and an even better provider. He, from the very beginning, has strived to do everything for our kids that I can do, minus breastfeeding {much to my chagrin}. He has buddies who boasted about never changing a diaper and he refused to be like those guys. I cannot brag on him enough. Right now he is pushing our littlest one on the swingset in the back yard, “protecting” her from the bugs out there. All good things. 

Even when we met, everything was magical. I decided the first night that we met and had our first kiss that he was the love of my life. Ever since that night, we have just fit together perfectly. His college friends thought we were crazy when we talked about marriage after dating for one month, but we knew it was true. We were married exactly one year after meeting. I have never once doubted our marriage or our relationship. Except…

Sometimes I Hate My Husband and The Art of the Hate Date | Houston Moms Blog

Sometimes I hate my husband. He drives me bananas. 

I’m sure he has his own list of how I drive him bananas. I am certainly not easy to live with. In fact, when he asked my parents for my hand in marriage they both responded in unison with :: “Are you sure? She can be quite a handful.” But there are sometimes that I just need a break from my husband. Here are a few reasons how he drives me bananas ::

The Dreaded Man Flu

My husband is the WORST at being sick. Everything is miserable. He can’t move or do anything. Meanwhile, as a mom, even the doctor {when I get a chance to go} understands that I can’t be down with a “sick day”. I don’t have time to be sick. I went to the doc a few weeks ago because I literally couldn’t breathe and they were a little mad at me when I said I felt sick for 3 weeks straight. Meanwhile, my husband got the sniffles and was out for three days. 

He doesn’t listen

Look. I get it. My husband and I are in two different industries. I am into social media and writing blog posts. I get nerdy excited about insights, followers, and how many moms we reach with a post/meme/graphic I wrote or created. My husband about any of that. While it allows me to bad talk him on Instagram, it drives me crazy. Sometimes I feel like he is trying to get through a conversation with me in order for it to end, not because he’s interested in what I’m interested in. I CANNOT tell you how many times he has fallen asleep while I was talking to him about something I was interested in. He’s a nerdy engineer and loves to talk about things I do not understand about, but I listen and remember things he says. I listen when he talks. 

He doesn’t remember anything

Y’all. The other day he asked me if he could have a boys night with some friends and I said :: “Sure. Just put it on the Cozi,” our shared calendar app. He never put anything on it, so I asked him about it. He swears up and down that he never had a conversation with me about going out with his friends and didn’t plan anything. He was actually angry that he thought I was sneaking behind his back or talking to the other wives about it. No, I remembered a conversation we had. Yes, sometimes I do use this as a trick if I forget to share something with him, but for the most part, it bugs me. 

He tries to lecture our little kids about EVERYTHING

My husband LOVES to lecture the kids {3 and 5} about whatever they are doing wrong. He’ll start with, “Come over here and let’s talk.” My problem with that is they are super young. By the time they sit down and he starts talking, they are done listening. Just tell them not to do something and move on. A lot of times he forgets that he’s talking to little ones and tries to have adult-y type conversations with them. He also lets every little thing bother him with the kids. I have told him many times that we need to pick our battles, to which he responds with “Well, I pick this battle.” We can’t get mad or angry at a level 7 over a small human error. Sometimes you have to let things go. His blood pressure agrees. 

The Hate Date

I could definitely keep going, but I think that’s enough. Sometimes he drives me bananas, y’all. We have a very unique way of expressing our anger. Sure, I could sigh loudly 750 times as he falls asleep, exasperated that he could even fall asleep when we are clearly having a “crisis moment”, but we do something called a “Hate Date”. It may not be healthy, but we head to a restaurant or bar, load up with yummy foods AND drinks, get a little tipsy and just unload on each other. All of the curse words we aren’t allowed to say in front of the kids come out. Lots of “Well, you…” or “You don’t!!”, and sure there are a bunch of “Well, your mother!!!” Most of the time it ends in giggles and us remembering that we love each other and that we all have issues. When small things {like the ones I described} bubble up to the surface, we just need to unleash our kind of wrath on each other. 100% of the time all of our issues and drama melt away. 

For me, it’s okay that I hate him sometimes. There are so many good, positive, AMAZING things that I have to brag about with him and maybe it’s the other side that keeps things interesting. It definitely keeps local bars in business, when the angry, seething couple walks in the door and leave giggling at each other. 


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Jennifer is a native outside-the-loop’er growing up and living in the Richmond/Rosenberg area. She has a Bachelors in theology and political science from Texas Lutheran University and a Masters in Liberal Arts from Texas Christian University. She and her husband Greg met in 2010 through and fell in love on their first date. They married exactly one year later and have fought lovingly and constantly since. They have two amazingly brilliant girls, Kaitlyn {June 2013} and Elizabeth {June 2015} who Jen stays home with during the day. When Jen is not curled in a little ball rocking back and forth with Peppa Pig on in the background, she can be found crafting with her Silhouette and/or binge watching The Office for the millionth time. Jen has an uncanny ability to be comfortable in almost any situation put in front of her, thanks to growing up in politics and on the debate team. Before having kids of her own, she had the opportunity to help other kids through teaching, youth ministry, and generally being a helpful, kind soul. You can check out more about Jen on IG @themommymiddle.


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