I am on a journey to seek rest
As the summer winds down and a new school year begins I find myself a little hesitant about the whole first days of school, running around like a crazy person from one thing to another, drop off, pick up, lists, forms, more fees…who’s with me!?
I love the lazy days of summer and I LOVE routines, but going from one extreme to another simply makes me feel like a yoyo, never finding a good, steady pace. Somewhere along the way we have bought into the idea that a busy, hurried life is our best or even only option, when the truth is, it’s not. As moms we are the ones who fall to this hectic, harried mentality because usually we are the schedule keepers of our homes and when what use to be your one schedule morphs into 3 more schedules…Hello Hustle, please be hospitable in this crazy race of life.
There is nothing more comfortable than a nicely established routine, where we run the race knowing for the most part what to expect and what bend is next. But, as the seasons change, so do out routines and so we begin again, always trying to hurry and catch up; hoping no one gets side tracked or derailed on that road race.
I decided to get off that road
I am on a journey to seek rest and that hurried race just isn’t part of the journey anymore.
I am not a good mom when I am hurried all the time.
I yell more when I am hurried.
I have little patience, and always feel guilty at the end of the hurry and the hustle.
When I am hustling, I lose sight of the true purpose for what I am working towards.
How can you be present for what really matters when you are hustling to whatever is next? How can you be in the moment if you are too hurried to get to the next one?
I have a plan or mantra I am living by:: I will be fiercely protective of my time.
So many times at the beginning of the school year, I open my calendar and I have this guttural gasp because how can any one human handle ALL. THE. THINGS.
When my time is overfull, rest doesn’t happen because rest and rush don’t work together.
Truth:: My calendar gets overfull because I don’t say no, therefore not protecting my time. Someone wants to meet for coffee? Sure! Can you help with this event? Ok. All of a sudden, there is no margin of time. No time for my people or myself. So what we are left with is a harried, hurried, haggard mommy!
The most difficult and exhausting things we do as moms are usually because they are time wasters that add very little value to what we truly believe is important. You have to determine your desire for your family, relationships and yourself and fiercely protect your time. Certain things must take priority, everything else will be taken into consideration knowing that ‘I am fiercely protecting my time.’
Let’s talk about rest
What does rest even mean? Well, it is the complete opposite of hurry! Rest looks a little different for everyone. For me, rest is minimal chores, reading a book, taking a bath, playing board games with my kids without looking at the time, laying on a hammock, eating yummy food, going for a walk, etc.
For my husband rest looks like cooking a new recipe, working on a project he enjoys, playing with the kids, sleeping in and of course, sex (because, duh).
Fiercely protecting my time goes hand in hand with fiercely protecting my rest. I know resting doesn’t happen too much during the week, so I have to be very intentional about it and try to do one or two of those above per day, be that setting time aside to read in the afternoons, even for just 20 minutes. That is basic self care, but rest is more than just 20 minute self care.
Rest is Soul Care.
On this journey of rest for our family, our Saturday evenings and Sundays are the days where we will intentionally rest. Where we will do so many of the things listed above or simply just be together as a family, without distractions, without obligations, without hustle. Just Be. This can be any day, but I encourage you to make it a full 24 hours, remember, soul care, not self care.
5 ways to really rest one day a week::
Plan your meals ahead::
Saturday evening is a family night. In our house, especially with teens, friends are for Friday night, family is for Saturday. Now, we have extended family and family we call “framily,” who are always welcomed, so on Saturday evenings we connect, we talk, we celebrate the highs and lows of the week and we enjoy each other. Sunday breakfast is easy and Sunday lunch is a roast or lasagna- something simple, but hearty and delicious, and dinner is leftovers. This helps me rest because it’s planned, it’s simple, it’s yummy and cooking and cleaning is minimal.
Put your devices away. Completely::
Just try it!! Our brains have to rest from all of the information, the ugliness of the news, the constant noise and barrage of worthless chatter! Our kids need to know how to be away from their devices too. This is a real problem friends. We all know it, but what are we doing about it? Seriously, ya’ll, what if we used the phone as just that…a phone? I bet, you wouldn’t even miss it; try it, one day a week, and soon you won’t be able to wait to disregard your phone for a day every weekend.
Find things to celebrate. Celebration is so good for our souls. Treat the day as a holiday! Do a cookout, invite your favorite people, eat yummy food, play, encourage, toast. We all look forward to holiday weekends, so make every weekend a holiday. A vacation for your soul.
Set time aside to do what you love::
If you love taking naps, but never have time to…take a nap. Work on those crafts that give you joy. Swing on a hammock. Teach the kids to play poker, grab a bucket of M&M’s and go all in! Try that new recipe you have been wanting to make. Read a book and keep reading. Go hiking. Go on an adventure. Take a drive just to drive. Enjoy the simple pleasures and to go along with that…
Clean out your purse, or that closet that erupted towels and sheets. Organize something. I know, this doesn’t sound like rest, but believe me, there is no better feeling than organizing even just one drawer, rather than looking at the clutter. Remember Marie Kondo! Try not to spend any money. Enjoy what you already have. Again, take joy in the simple pleasures. Enjoy the quiet. Get out in nature. Watch an old movie. Dance in your kitchen. Breathe.
Journey with me and rest. Real, soul reviving, deep connecting kinda rest. Seasons are changing, let’s really live in them and enjoy whatever the season holds!