Thanks…but she’s a girl.

I don’t mean to brag, but I seriously have the most precious little girl.  I love her fun loving personality.  I love her sweet demeanor.  I love how she is crazy about dolls and jewelry and all things girly.  I love how she sings and dances even when there isn’t any music on.  I love her precious dimples.  And I even love her bald little head.

You see, at almost two years old – my daughter barely has any hair.  Not enough for those fun little piggy tails.  Not enough for that lone whale spout.  Not even enough for a teeny tiny hair clip.  She is totally and completely bald.

And you know what?  I don’t care.

I don’t look at her and dream of long flowing locks that I have to spray a gallon of detangler in each day.  I don’t mourn the loss of ALL of those sweet little baby bows I spent my life savings on when pregnant.  I don’t worry about what other people think of her.

That is…until I do.

I know it’s silly and petty, and TRUST ME – I have been through the ringer when it comes to looks and stares and comments about my children and much more serious issues.  But it doesn’t make it sting any less when strangers start throwing out unnecessary comments about how bald she is, and is that child EVER going to grow any hair, and it especially makes me cringe when I get…”Oh, what a handsome little boy you have.”  Believe me when I say that it takes every ounce of Southern Belle in me to bite my tongue and mumble back, “Thanks, but she’s a girl.”  Especially since 99.9% of the time she is in head to toe pink with sparkly shoes, all of which are her choosing.

I don’t know if it’s the fact that we are preparing to celebrate her second birthday, or if it’s because I’ve noticed she is growing more self aware every day, or if it’s just because I’ve heard one version or another of the “your little boy is so cute” comment about 23984939 times.  But lately I’ve been so incredibly hyper-sensitive to it.  In fact, just the other day a little old man at the grocery store made a seemingly innocent comment, and I sat in my car and cried for a solid minute before driving home.  Over dramatic?  Maybe.  My honest-to-goodness emotions?  Absolutely.

So instead of sitting on my rump and growing frustrated with the constant remarks I get, I decided to stand up for every sweet little baldy and do a simple PSA infographic on how to tell whether a bald baby/toddler/kiddo is in fact…a girl.  {Of course, modeled by my very own bald and beautiful girly girl.}  My hope is that it will enlighten those around me and maybe – just maybe – I’ll be able to go a week without uttering those five little words, “Thanks, but she’s a girl.”

Bald Girl Infographic

Oh, and as an epilogue…I did a little research on what causes some babies to be born – and continue to stay – bald.  Is it the lack of heartburn I had during pregnancy?  Is it some type of hair thickening baby shampoo I forgot to buy?  Is it a jinx since I bought ALL of those sweet little baby bows?  Nope.  It’s just good ole’ genetics.  So you probably won’t be surprised to see that when I was about her age I looked like this…

Kelly - Toddler{No lie – my mom named this picture “no hair” when she sent it to me.  Can you IMAGINE the comments she probably got?!?!}

Previous articleAthletic Apparel Helps Spread Awareness for Ovarian Cancer {Plus a Giveaway!}
Next articleRare & Special
Kelly is the founder of Houston Moms Blog and has lived in this beautiful city nearly all of her life. She has a degree in education from Texas State University and was honored to teach special education for eight years to some of the cutest little kiddos you could ever meet. While teaching, Kelly met Cody – a tall drink of water and country boy to the core – and together, they fell in love, got married, and decided to start a family. In March 2011, they welcomed Hayes into the world, a silly but smart little boy with a story you have to read to believe. And in April 2013, their family was complete with the addition of Hadley, a super gregarious and oh-so-cute baby girl. Now, Kelly devotes her days to caring for her own little ones…and would not trade this new job of hers for the world! In her not-so-spare time, Kelly loves meeting up with her girlfriends for margaritas, failing miserably at Pinterest projects, and exploring this big old city with her two favorite little side-kicks in tow.

29 COMMENTS

  1. I had the same problem when I was a baby. And I had a mom friend recently with who’s daughter had the same slow growing thin hair and everyone thought she was a boy. She used to worry and stress out about it. But, I always told her it would come. Once my hair finally decided to grow it grew fast and thick and is a mess. I have curls. Maybe that’s why? I don’t know. But it’s funny how I started the first couple years of my life with nearly no hair on my head and now every time I go to a new hairdresser they remark of just how much hair I have.

    Don’t let it bother you mom! Your little girl is absolutely precious. We’re expecting our daughter this May and if she ends up anything like I did as a baby she’ll have the same bald head. But it doesn’t make her less of a girl, her personality says it all!

    You have a beautiful daughter!

  2. Kelly, thank you thank you thank you for this post!!! This is exactly me and my 5 month old. She had a nice full head of hair at birth but within days it had all fell out (just like me) and ia very slowing getting it back. I was almost 3 before I had any hair and still havr very fine thin hair at 30 years old and you know what I am ok with that. Myself or my daughter will never have flowing long locks and can never hold a curl but we can also blow-dry our hair in under 5 minutes!!! 🙂

  3. People are so oblivious and quick to the tongue. You have grace by taking it in stride, your baby girl IS beautiful and all she needs if your unending love.
    And I love that pic of you! You go girl!

  4. I enjoyed this post! I just want to say, I was bald just like that until I was about two and a half. My dad didn’t like the way headbands looked, so never got to wear any of those, and not enough hair for the fun clips and bows. People often said what a cute little boy I was. And now, I have a crazy ridiculous amount of huge, thick hair. Like, more hair than I know what to do with. When I go to a new stylist, I usually get the comment, “you have a lot of hair – the most hair I’ve ever seen on a person.” Weird how those things work out!!

  5. I am in LOVE with the infographic! She is a hoot! Amelia would be in her gaudy purple car seat, bow and all and I’d get the same comments. Hello?!? And baby Kelly is about the most adorable thing in the world. Y’all are definitely twinsies!

  6. Kelly, first of All Thanks For sharing your post! Your daughter just beautiful and perfection! Oh, people always love to make comments towards other cuties!! my daughter is 7 months and really taller that other kids, so twice a day, it’s just a norm I should hear, how big she is. Come on!! As soon as our children are healthy and full of happiness with a pretty smile on the face, nothing else matter. Please let’s kids be kids and spend their pure childhood without grown ups silly comments and suggestions. Great job mama, we must always stand up for our kids!!

  7. I love this article! I was bald for the first three years of my life and my mom got so many of those comments (because I didn’t act so girly)that she legally had my name changed from Kelly to Kelli when I was 2. And then my daughter was also bald and that lasted till she was 4! But I personally think the most beautiful babies are bald!

  8. I have the same/opposite issue with my boy. He was born with a full head of hair and especially last summer when his hair was curly it was always “aww she’s so cute!!” The best is one time my husband gave a woman a look who said it and she said “oh, is she not yours?” What?! That’s where you went? Lol. He was wearing cargo shorts and a blue t shirt that day 🙂

  9. I didn’t have any hair until almost 3 and neither did my sister and 2 nieces. I was shocked as could be when my baby girl came out with a head full. And I still had someone call her a boy.

  10. I have a 2 yr old boy with long hair. People always comment on how cute SHE is! He can be wearing the most stereotypical boy clothes, yet people still say it.

    I think they’re just trying to be nice and say thanks. Really am I ever going to see them again? I don’t bother correcting them.

    But I do think it’s indicative of our society’s need to see gender. Why not say, “what a cute child!” And avoid gender all together?

  11. Loved this! That’s crazy people think she’s a boy because she looks SO girly to me. I had people tell me what a pretty daughter I had when Oliver was a baby … Even though he was dressed in blue and had a faux-hawk. I think baby boys with lots of hair have the same problem as bald baby girls 🙂

  12. Kelly, I feel like I can so relate to this post but for the opposite reason. My youngest boy Fisher was born with a head full of hair and was constantly referred to as a girl. It didn’t help that I preferred neutral colored baby clothes over anything overly boyish, like sports or monster trucks, etc. Also, by the time he was 2 he’d picked a baby doll from the toy store and loved carrying it around with him for the longest time. But I didn’t ever let what others thought or said influence how I dressed him or when to cut his hair, etc. But I did always semi want to punch people in the nose when they’d follow up their girl comments with, “oh, but he’s just so pretty!” Now, he’s 5 and there’s no mistaking him as anything but all boy, although I do sometimes miss his sweet little locks and him toting around his baby doll. 😉

  13. My twin daughters were the same, but one lady took the cake. They were both in flowery pink and purple jumpers and a lady said “Oh how cute, girls?” I said yes and she then asked names. I told her Devin and Emma, to which she responded “Oh, a boy and a girl then!” Geez! Some people…I also even still have people ask me when they are standing next to each other if they are identical. I just want to say “Do you have eyes?”

  14. I had this same issue with my little princess, even her diamond earrings and pink laced dresses weren’t enough to tell people she was clearly a girl! Oh and let’s not forget the biggest, gaudy bows you’ve ever seen. At 3 I finally had enough hair to make the saddest little pigtails that look like “horns” has my husband lovingly called them. She’s a red head so she had no eyebrows or eyelashes either, to this day at 7 there is more of a shadow reminiscent of those two features. Thankfully now and days she has more hair then I know what to do with, I guess be careful what you wish for. Some times those 3 pounds of red cork screw curls that when wet go past her little tush are more then I feel like combing through, not to mention the arsenal of hair products to tame it all down. I too was a “baldy” and my mom desperately taped bows to my head because my earrings and pink flamingo outfits from head to toe weren’t enough of a gender decipher either. Some people are either just blind or seriously have no idea when to look befor asking “boy or girl?”

  15. Bald until I was 4 and today at 24 I’ve got uber thick long red hair that grows crazy fast and is half way down my back. Worth the wait! My teachers even asked my mom if I was too young for preschool.

  16. She is adorable! I completely understand this emotion, my little guy is all boy. Skull and cross bone dress shirts with mocs and ball caps and I regularly get told how adorable “she” is. I think to myself, who would dress their little girl like this!?!?

  17. Kelly- she’s a doll and glad you recognize her value “even” without hair 🙂 I was just as bald til close to 3. To make matters worse, I was a tomboy and we lived in South America where all baby girls have pierced ears. My mom finally caved and got my ears pierced at 3 because she was tired of the “cute boy” comments. Ha! Somehow it didn’t give me a complex and her ability to roll with the punches and keep me secure in her love made it seem like no big deal. Keep loving on that sweet bald thing. Personally I LOVE bald babies so if I ever see you in public and fawn over her lack of hair, it really is because I think she’s darling!!

  18. i get just the opposite. My 6 year old boy decided he wanted to grow his hair out (he has an uncle with long hair and wanted to copy him). His hair is shoulder length but he is very boyish, dresses in very boy clothes and acts very much like a rambunctious boy. I have two younger daughters. Everywhere we go, restaurants, stores, the park etc. people comment about what beautiful girls I have. My son often speaks up for himself, “I’m a boy!” I wish that in this day and age people would stop using hair as a gender indication. My son likes having longer hair and coincidentally my older girl likes having short hair even though she is incredibly girly.

  19. My son (age 9) was diagnosed with alopecia areata totalis when he was 5. He is totally and completely bald. I had never even heard of it before his hair fell out. Sometimes, on windy days, my heart breaks when he complains about dirt in his eyes (no eyelashes). The hardest thing for me to hear in the beginning was, “Thank God he’s not a girl.” But, I always thought, at least girls are allowed to wear wigs and use makeup. Boys just have to rock it, and rock it he does. One day, he started to grow five little eyelashes. And started to cry, saying, “But I like being bald.” So I guess, somewhere, we did something right in helping him embrace it and own it, and not let alopecia own him. For anyone who has children that are bald and dealing with this strange disease, CAP (Children’s Alopecia Project) is an amazing organization that helps kids of all ages (and parents) deal with this.

  20. I think your right, this is silly and a bit petty. You are certainly blessed and your baby GIRL is beautiful. Just think how some children have alopecia and can’t grow hair at all… ever … and some walk around with no hair because they are suffering from cancer. I’m sure your little baby’s hair will be grown out in no time and you will be missing her baby soft head. As for the remarks people give you, well, on a positive note at least they won’t effect your daughter because she won’t remember them. By the way, I hope this comment doesn’t come off rude… not trying to be!

    • Your comment doesn’t come off as rude at all, Lisa – and I so appreciate your feedback! I’m not sure if you followed the link to my son’s story, but I have been through A LOT as a mom and gotten all kinds of looks and comments when my son was in a helmet and had to have supplemental oxygen (through a nasal cannula and an O2 tank) as a baby. So out of everyone, I certainly know that I am beyond blessed with a healthy baby girl and that what we go through is in NO comparison to other’s journeys. However, I have also learned that ALL moms have sturggles – whether it’s a girl who has yet to sprout some hair (like my daughter) or a child who was born with a rare and very severe birth defect (like my son). And the beauty is that we all rally together to support whatever perceived struggles we are going through. That’s what makes this whole mom gig and the community that comes with it so great, right? 🙂

  21. Who will ever know what makes strangers say the darned things that come out of their mouth after a woman has endured 9 painful months and is now raging with hormones and never quite the same again. When I met baby H, I didn’t even realize that she was bald. Maybe my sense of “beauty” is different than others’ or maybe I was just distracted by her super fun energy!

  22. I was at a yearly appointment with my OBGYN who delivered my daughter a year before and she said, what a cute BOY he is…. seriously? You delivered her!!!

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here