When Mother’s Day falls in the middle of a pandemic, how do we celebrate moms in a meaningful way?
How do moms want to be recognized this year?
Guys, it’s been a year! 2020 came and beat us down. What can I say:: I feel like as a mother I have aged 500 years, and trust me, with no salons open I probably look like it too. The Coronavirus has had the world locked down and indoors with our families since March. Its been quite something! Hands up – who has gotten to know their kids really really well?
For some it has been a time of quiet awakening and for others it has been a time of turmoil.
For me it has been a bit of both. The blessing of having my children with me. The sadness of not being able to see my own mother this month as planned. It will now be a countdown to infinity as the future is just an unknown right now.
This year Covid 19 gifted us our kids 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We have have had to crisis school them, and have had the pleasure of feeding them every 30 minutes with an onslaught of snacks. We have been gym instructors, cleaners, gardeners, laundromats and referees to sibling rivalry. It has been a full time job with no end in sight. Much of it has not been pretty as we have all had to find a new way of living our lives.
This year give your mom the gift of time. Time to think and time to be without interruption if that is her choice. Alternatively give your mom time – your time. Time where you give her 100% of yourself. Time is such a gift and if I have learned anything during this world crisis we do not have a lot of it. Use your time wisely.
Who is YOUR Mom?
If I close my eyes and I think of my mom I feel intense safety, security and a deep love. It was not always that way. In my teens when I was feisty, full of it, and tended to think I knew more, I thought she was the enemy that was there to curtail my enjoyment and prevent my freedom. She never showed weakness and would take the onslaught of whatever came her way. Moms are tough. They love even when they are not loved back. They fight even when it feels like no one is winning. Moms have your back long after you left home and started your own families.
Moms are the foundation and nurturing of the family, the first face you fall in love with when you are born. Hers is the first voice you recognized and as a child we know our mothers intimately as we felt her heart beat from inside her body. How beautiful is that?
Moms, however, are still human even if we are the ones that keep the light burning when it feels so very dark. Acknowledge the human side. We hurt, we feel sad, we get angry, we have great ups and downs and at times we are weak. We have dreams and aspirations and feel great guilt when we don’t gift ourselves to our kids 100% of the time. Recognize the human in your mom. Love her at her best and love her at her worst, as she does you. Be kind.
On my last trip to South Africa, I found myself sitting at the living room entertainment cupboard opening up all the folders and files and boxes my mom has kept since I guess her teens. I found myself reading love letters from my father, pages and pages of stories all beautifully written. I found all my love letters written to my mom as a little girl, Mother’s Day cards from myself and my siblings, dating back to the 70’s. Younger then than my kids are now. It sparked such pure joy feeling those handmade cards, reading those words and it sparked so many memories of when we used to huddle in my parents bed on Mother’s Day, fresh flowers picked from the garden, daisies to be precise and home made pancakes sprinkled with cinnamon sugar. Thats what we should be creating for our mothers. Happy memories. Making memories.
This year, to celebrate moms, we have to get creative. Write a letter, make a card. Honor her. Words on paper are permanent and can be touched and reread and saved and cherished and enjoyed for a lifetime to come. Words of endearment. Share little memories that you carry with you of the love story you have as a mother and child. Create new memories with your mom. If you are not able to be with her, call her.
This Mother’s Day
This mothers day celebrate all moms. Moms, mom in laws, moms that have passed on, moms that have lost their children. Celebrate foster moms, birth moms, moms to be and think of those that have always wanted to be moms.
When I was about three my mom used to ask me what I wanted to be when I was a grown up. I said “I want to be a lady, and ladies have babies”. Being a mom has been the hardest but most rewarding thing I have ever done in my life. My whole entire being is filled up with my two daughters who shine their light the brightest. I was also gifted a life with my beautiful mom. I recognize her and all the sacrifices she has made me for me.
As a woman, it is the greatest gift to be a mother. Let us recognize that.
Side Note:: Gifting Ideas
Handmade cards and crafts. Flowers and chocolates. Gift cards for her favorite stores. Mine are Zara and Sephora. Bake for her and clean the kitchen. Let her put her feet up and do the cooking for the day. No laundry, no clean up, no service.
Plenty of cuddles, no sibling rivalry.
Use lips of service and be kind.