When “Self-Care” Backfires…and How to Simplify to Live Your Best Life

I don’t know if it’s just me, but lately I have been so tuned in to ways that moms, women, people, need to stop and take better care of themselves. It’s the idea of securing your oxygen mask first so you can properly help others. The hashtag #selfcaresunday is a huge thing on the ‘gram, from meal prepping to outlining everything for the upcoming week, to simple pleasures like reading, taking a hot bath or meditation exercises.  It makes total sense right?  

I am a huge advocate for self-care “me time” mom time, being your best self…however you want to call it, but as I became more aware of everything I “should” be doing to care for myself, I slowly started feeling that I was failing and left feeling the opposite of cared for.

What does self-care even mean?  

Self-care is anything that will better yourself. What recharges you?  What makes you the best mom, wife, friend, employee?  What makes you smile?  But it’s not just about the things in life that fill you up, but also what is going to allow you to perform as your best self.

Think sleep, nutrition, mindfulness, mental health, and appearance. Ultimately, how can you live your best life and be your best YOU?

Sounds amazing right? Sign me up! 

I Signed Up for It All…and Failed

…and that’s pretty much what I did!  I signed up for all the Facebook Groups, hashtags, support groups, accountability groups, bought the books, downloaded the apps, earned the t-shirt.  I’m ready to be my best self now! 

The daily activity in my brain looks a little like this ::

Drink half my weight in ounces of water
Move for at least 30 minutes
Meditate for 10 minutes
Get 8 hours of sleep 
Get up one hour before my kids get up to do something for me
Eat this, not that
Get 10,000 steps 
Try something new
Write 10 things I’m grateful for
Put the phone down and enjoy quality with family
Make to-do list for following day to be most productive

And this is on top of my usual daily activities like WORK a 9-5, school drop-offs, feed my people, work my skincare business & run to the bathroom 5,000 times a day from drinking all that dang water I listed first!

What at first seemed like a fun challenge suddenly became all-consuming, suffocating and daily reminder of how much I failed that day…again…and again….and again!  

I Simplified Self Care

My journey of self-care came to an abrupt halt when I was hit by a ton of bricks, or in this case – an awful virus.  I self-cared myself into sickness.  If that isn’t irony then I don’t know what is. 

Suddenly I was forced to widdle that long “journey to my best self” daily task list to ::


And it felt really good.  And simple.  And guess what?  It worked!  

It took illness to wake me up and realize that this movement isn’t meant to make you feel bad.  We might be missing the point if it is. Just like the woman who posted that she uses her one hour of getting up early for herself to…take a nap.  Missing the point again, people!

Let’s do what we can for ourselves and then give yourself grace…just don’t make excuses!  I’m still struggling with finding that perfect balance.  


  1. You go girl! Self care is important but keeping up with it can be a struggle. We need to remember that self care doesn’t mean taking the day at a spa or going to a fancy restaurant. Self care should be a part of our daily routine. I love the things you shared that you are working towards. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for this amazing blog post! Have a lovely evening <3


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